Friday, June 02, 2006

Immigration: Quick Fix Ideas

Lots of talk these days about Immigration. Suggested solutions sound as follows:

Build a fence! Round 'em all up and deport 'em all!

Look, the key word in "Illegal Aliens" is ILLEGAL. Can we arrest them all? Of course not. What to do, then? It's funny, this has been going on for years, but only now has it become a hot button issue. Since rounding up 12 million people for deportation is impossible, and building a fence is a waste of time, what do we do? How about asking the big question - why are they so desperate to leave Mexico? How bad are things there? Didn't NAFTA create more jobs in Mexico, at the expense of American manufacturing jobs?

Look, I can't fault anyone for wanting to come here. We have a large land, full of opportunity, and I will never fault any person who is trying to improve their life. But….why not go through the process and do it legally, as millions have already done? Don't even get me started on the lack of desire to learn English and at least attempt to assimilate.

The solution is simple. Three easy options are presented below.

1.) Call out the Mexican government, demand they assist in the effort to keep their own people from crossing the border. If they're such "good friends", as Bush keeps telling us, they should be more than willing to help.

2.) Punish those in the US who hire cheap Mexican labor, eliminating the incentive for them to cross the border. This will undoubtedly ruffle some big feathers, since many large corporations (read: contributors to the GOP) are guilty of this.

3.) Wait, I've got it! Bring the troops back from Iraq, and stick them on the border, thereby fixing two hot button issues at once. So simple, which means there is no way in Hell this
administration will do it.

There, fixed that for ya! Anything else you need straightened out?
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